Quiche is a much misunderstood flan and savoury bake. Whereas its origins in French cuisine may not have done its tough guy reputation any favours, it was the 1982 book Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche which finally put the kibosh on it.

In reality, making a quiche is a challenge that only a true hard case would attempt. Some ghetto pimps are rumoured to bake nothing else. The recipe is as follows:

Get a flan ring, line the bottom with pastry and put some pastry on the sides as well. Bake it for 15 mins in a fairly hot oven. If it looks like the pastry is rising put something heavy yet non-flammable upon it

Parboil the broccoli gently (this term is explained in the glossary.)
Whisk three eggs with some double cream, add the brocolli and some cheese.

Pour into the parbaked pastry shell, and move around so it’s not all clumped in the middle. Cook for 30 mins or until the smoke alarm
goes off.

Rage Cuisine Tip:
Don’t make holes in the bottom of your flan. If you do, the quiche
will leak out.